I agree with this, on the whole. The venting is necessary, I think, when one either has tried and failed to communicate with the person in question and must still resolve an untenable situation, or cannot figure out how to muster the courage or proper words to talk to a person who might be causing serious stress.
I make a distinction between venting and gossip. The former is necessary to relieve stress, typically amongst a group of people who either knows the person and can help come up with a constructive solution to the problem, or with (as you suggest) a group of people who will never meet the person under normal circumstances. Gossip, however, turns upon at least a whiff of malice that adds excitement and danger to the mix. I tend to have more of a problem with the gossiper than the gossipee, as I make a point of making up my own mind about each person I meet, but that's largely because I'm very keenly aware of the danger you mention here.
I'm far too tired to make any more sense than I already have (which may be pitiful), so I'll just thank you for the comment and your patience with my response, and then I'll be good and go away. :)
no subject
I make a distinction between venting and gossip. The former is necessary to relieve stress, typically amongst a group of people who either knows the person and can help come up with a constructive solution to the problem, or with (as you suggest) a group of people who will never meet the person under normal circumstances. Gossip, however, turns upon at least a whiff of malice that adds excitement and danger to the mix. I tend to have more of a problem with the gossiper than the gossipee, as I make a point of making up my own mind about each person I meet, but that's largely because I'm very keenly aware of the danger you mention here.
I'm far too tired to make any more sense than I already have (which may be pitiful), so I'll just thank you for the comment and your patience with my response, and then I'll be good and go away. :)
Catherine